Today's Marketing Cookie - Grow

​Today's Marketing Cookie is a request... not a prediction. If the cookie proclaimed that you will BE rich, I would be congratulating you. However, the cookie says, GROW rich, and that is clearly an action, not a description. I would like to focus on the word "grow".

As marketers, we must plant seeds and nurture our prospects until a relationship can grow to the point when they become ready to buy. Growing leads is an activity, not a promise. Just buying some advertising, sending some direct mail and employing other marketing tactics, does not mean you'll get the results you need. Nurturing leads is like planting a garden and you have to understand the climate, avoid the hazards and be aware of your competitors. Allow me to tell you what I've learned about gardening.

We were living in Kentucky at the time and unlike the climate I was used to in New England, the flowers and trees are full, and the grass is as green as can be in early March. I woke up one morning and decided that I would try and plant a garden. I tilled the ground, bought a bunch of seeds and planted the most ambitious garden anyone has ever seen! I swear that I dreamt about salads every night for weeks.

There must be something powerful in the Kentucky ground, because my little veggies started growing like crazy. The little sprouts popped-up their heads out of the ground and quickly turned into beautiful little plants. I woke up early one morning so I could admire my garden through the kitchen window and then I saw a fat bunny eating away at my young lettuce.  I opened the window and yelled at the bunny saying, "Hey you fat bunny, get out of my garden!!". The fat bunny stopped chewing, looked at me for about two seconds and kept on eating. So, I flew open the door and ran at him in my pajamas to chase him off. A little while later, the fat bunny was back!

Oh no you didn't!!

Next, I drove about 180 miles an hour to the hardware store and bought some chicken wire fence and a couple dozen posts. I worked all day putting up a fence that would definitely keep that fat bunny out of my garden! Meanwhile, whatever the fat bunny hadn't already eaten, was growing astonishingly fast. However, when I looked around at my neighbors, I noticed none of them had started their gardens yet. I didn't care. I will be eating fresh tomatoes on my porch months before everyone else.

YAY!

The next morning, I looked out of the kitchen window and the fat bunny had somehow gotten himself under the fence and into my garden again. He was munching away on my bean plants. Not my bean plants!!!? I blew out of the kitchen door screaming at the fat bunny. However, it had rained a little that night and I slipped on the wet grass and fell on my bum.  The fat bunny stopped chewing and I swear he chuckled at me. He chuckled! I didn't like his attitude, and I was so furious that I picked up a brick that was laying there, and threw it at him. At the last possible second, the fat bunny took an apathetic little step to the left, and let the brick flatten one of my carrot plants.

Grrrr.

Whenever I patched up the fence where the fat bunny got in, he would always find another way to munch my garden the next day. I was practically losing my voice from yelling and screaming at the fat bunny every morning. Soon, almost all of my plants had been eaten and I was down to my last head of lettuce. I promised myself that I would protect my only remaining lettuce plant. So, I went to the department store and bought a high-powered, gas-propelled pellet gun.

Yes. That's right. I planned to shoot the fat bunny.

I loaded the gun and kept watch. Morning after morning I waited for him, but the fat bunny didn't show up. Did he know somehow that I bought a gun? Could he see me in the window? About a week later, he was back!! I snuck out the front door and crept through the carport, making sure every step I took was absolutely silent. I leaned against the side of the house like James Bond and looked just past the corner until I could see the fat bunny eating what was left of my last head of lettuce. I raised my gun, took careful aim, held my breath like a sniper and tried to pull the trigger. The stupid safety was still on... What!? Oh duh! Okay... so I reset my shooting stance, had the fat bunny in my crosshair and pulled the trigger... Just then, the gun totally disintegrated in my hands. The gas cartridge made a giant BANG!, the barrel popped off, and a hundred pellets scattered all over the driveway. The fat bunny finished off my last leaf of lettuce, he looked at me, sort of smiled at me and waddled away.

The next day, it began to rain, rain, rain, and it didn't stop raining for about three straight weeks, which completely flooded and washed away my little garden.  When the rain finally stopped, all of my neighbors came outside and began planting their gardens.

Luckily, I am much better at growing leads than vegetables.